Open Letter To Gid

from JoeUser Forums

Hello Gid,

Since you do not offer me a chance to comment on your blog, I thought I would here.  I figured I had two choices.  One, to ignore what you said and the other to speak out on it.

I chose the latter.....obviously.

You said you expect, as a result of what you wrote, to see a flame blog from me?  Based on what?  When have I ever flamed anyone?  My articles are here for all to see and I've not once resorted to flame throwing.  Not once.   I have no use for such immaturity. 

I'm not here to flame you.

You say in your letter "Stopping By" that you have admitted yourself as being dysfunctional.  Well who isn't?  We all come from some sort of dysfunction.  There are no perfect families on the planet that I'm aware of.  I came from a dystunctional family as well.  But I don't wallow in it.  I choose to go on.  While you can't help what happened to you, you do have a choice to make sure it doesn't happen to your own family.  Sorry to say, you'd rather wallow in dysfuntion, then walk away from it.   Change begins with you Gid.   

You were very quick to attack the dysfunctional church. You gave much time to this subject.  From what I could see, they only wanted to help your family even if that meant calling in outside help.  You said no, they were not helping you, and since I wasn't there, what else could I say?   You say, I didn't see things?   You say I didn't notice you needed help? 

To the full extent you're right.  I didn't see the severity until afterwards.  Chalk it up to 20/20 hindsight.  But there were many, many red flags you waved and when I'd comment on them, you'd get very angry with me.  You didn't like me to go there remember?  Whenever I'd question you, you'd get angry.  Usually this centered around the church helping you or "not" helping you.   Whenever anyone would dare question you on CPS or the church you got very defensive.  So obviously you didn't want any advice nor were you looking for help.  You only wished for us to validate your feelings against all the "bad" people who were after you. 

As far as your depression goes that you mentioned in your earlier blogs....I know nothing about that.  I never go back and read old blogs.  I have only enough time to read the current blogs.  If you were in church, like I kept advising you to do, this would have been replaced....I'm sure of it.   Remember Elijah?  Even he got depressed.  He pulled himself away and felt sorry for himself.  He had to be reminded, it's not all about HIM. 

You accuse many of us beliving the rumor in the article that LW wrote.   It was easy to do.  First you disappeared and I was wondering where you were.  I actually posted somewhere that I was wondering where you went to and Tova gave me a link to LW's blog that answered my question.   Along with your disappearance and the pictures came TW's firsthand comments.  Why wouldn't we believe?   You came on and pretty much admitted it yourself.  Again, why wouldn't we believe?  If I remember right, I made one or two comments on LW's blog and it had no "bashing" qualities to it.   It was basically one of shock and 20/20 hindsight. 

After you came on to explain yourself, I sent you a personal message telling you that I was praying for you and your family which I will continue to do.   I'm not sure what else to do Gid. I considered you a friend.  One cannot help another unless they first want the help.  Remember even Jesus asked the lame man..."do you wish to be well?" 

As far as I was concerned, that was the last of it for me.  I would never, ever, kick anyone when they're down. 

I'm sorry Gid that you've had a bad time of it.   But you have only yourself to blame.  Only you can change this around.  Sometimes it's not all that bad to reach rock bottom.  Because it forces you to look up.  It's all you've got. 

Don't blame us for your shortcomings.  We all tried to help you.  You refused to be helped. 

blogging
27,705 views 156 replies
Reply #1 from Stardock Forums Top

This is a hard one for me KFC.

Gid neglects his children.  Lies about it.

Gid rips off some old folks who try to help him.  Lies about it, then rationalizes it.

Gid comes back to JU full of excuses and "we don't know the whole story."  If the pictures were the only story...it was ENOUGH.

If he stayed away, then maybe, I'd believe he was serious about getting his life on track.

The fact he came back, and came back pointing his finger, well, I don't hold out much hope at this point.  My heart breaks for those kids.

When you visited me last I told ya there wasn't something right about him.  Maybe because I was forced to live part of my childhood like his kids?  I smelled the excuses because I heard them all before?  I dunno.

Part of the reason I am sick with him even being allowed on JU is because every time I see his name, I have to be reminded what a fool he made of all of us, his kids, all his big fat lies, and frankly, I throw up a little in my mouth.

JU is fun and interesting.

Gid casts a long ugly shadow on it.  It's like taking  your kids to a park and having fun, until some guy shows up with starving children, dirty and bedraggled, and never takes his eyes of his brand new state of the art laptop, while sucking down a Big Mac.  While his kids are huddling close together because its the first time they've ever been to a park.

Yeah, real fun.

 

Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top
Don't blame us for your shortcomings. We all tried to help you. You refused to be helped.
End of quote


Amen.

I still think it's absolutely hilarious that he's put you and Whip on some metaphysical team against him, which we're supposedly all playing pinch-hit on (even I'm on his blacklist now . . .)

But with the one-two punch of you and whip's responses, I hope that maybe he'll finally learn that he's burnt all his bridges here, and stop trying to be the attention . . . lover . . . that we all know.

(Like the 'creative edit'? :P)
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Reply #3 from Stardock Forums Top

KFC,

Not here to flame me? You picked up the biggest, choicest rock and launched it with all your might.

As far as trying to help me, no, the individuals in question did NOT do that! As I said in my article, what you guys DON'T know could fill several cargo containers. I would speak with you more about it, but as you and Tova were both quick to point out, you guys are NOT my friends, and I was a fool to think of you as such. I will speak with my REAL friends about any issues I may have, and leave you to what you are: nothing more than a distant online acquaintance who couldn't care less whether I live or die.

There were a whole bushel of lies in LW's article passed off as fact. Why didn't I jump up and decry all of them publicly? Simply because you guys are NOT a court of law, and I have no reason to justify ANYTHING to you.

I did NOT run and hide. My ex employer knew where I was going. Everyone at my school knew where I was going. Every friend I had in the area knew where I was going. And in the three (yes, THREE, despite their claiming none) letters I have written my former landlord, I stated where I was going, two of those letters have been sent from our current address. I wasn't online because I was too busy with other things to get online.

My main frustration with you, KFC, has to do with ministry. If we minister to people, doesn't that automatically mean there's something wrong? How can a church heal those who are already well? When you had the chance, you judged, found me guilty, and treated me with contempt, on the basis of very little evidence.

I may misread the Bible, but it's my understanding the fruits of the Spirit are love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control, not backbiting, rumormongering, and judging.

What I have read in comments since indicate that the only acceptable alternatives for me would be a) putting a bullet through my head, or b) abandoning my family and my education. I'm trying to IMPROVE things for my family by finishing my education, and it amazes me that nobody sees that,

What you didn't see over the ast two years were the eighty hour weeks I put in, without being able to come home between school and work because of the insane cost of fuel. You didn't see the rising costs of utilities crimping our budget tighter and tighter, or other problems we routinely dealt with in a community that chose to shun us. We answered every charge that was ever brought against us in tht town, KFC, and we left because there were few other options.

Our youngest son, by the way, was NOT planned, and there was a lot of stress involved. I suppose, though, you're right. We should have taken the easy way out and had an abortion so that we could have rid ourselves of THAT problem, right? That's the Godly way out, isn't it?

My main issue with you is one of disappointment, KFC. You reek of hypocrisy. You talk a big game, but have you once really, honestly, prayed for me and my family? And if you read the words of Jesus, SHOULDN'T YOU?

We've found a good fellowship here, one that truly lives the message it preaches. And I am thankful for it. I know I'm not where I need to be, but I'm trying hard to GET there. And people who thro stones don't help in that journey.

Reply #4 from Stardock Forums Top

Because you chose to address me in a reasonable manner, KFC, I lifted you from my blacklist.

I don't ask that you guys forgive me. All I ask is that you pray for me. Nothing more.

Reply #5 from Stardock Forums Top

Tova, SC,

Thanks for your witness.

I'll pray for you :)

Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top
Tova, SC,

Thanks for your witness.

I'll pray for you
End of quote


Yay for pretending to ride the high horse!

Good thing that you've still never backed up any of your assertions that there were 'lies' involved with your outing, so until you prove otherwise (and you've continually stated that you won't do anything of the sort) I don't have to believe a word that comes out of your mouth.

:)

(OOOOH, I can play the smiley-face game, too.)
Reply #7 from JoeUser Forums Top
Ah yes, those notorious 80 hour weeks, combined with at least another 40 or so posting THOUSANDS of lenghty, perfectly composed, and (usually) well researched articles on JU, and how many more hours responding to the comments recieved while also making your presence well known on the articles of others
End of quote


Amen.

You came back to JU for what exactly Gid?

After what you made your kids and wife live through the last several years, don't you think your time is more wisely spent else where? Like real life?

Every minute you spend on JU screams..."I haven't changed, I am still the most important thing in the world." My priorities are still screwed.

Get a life. Better yet, get a family life and stay off JU.

No excuses.

Just action.
Reply #8 from Stardock Forums Top

And yes, Gid, we're all well aware that you claim to be chock full of mysterious information that would explain all (or most of it) of away, 'several cargo containers full' to use your own words.
End of quote

Aye...and unfortunately I tend to have a scientific bias...I need access to information to bolster my belief.  My faith's a little thin these days...especially concerning you.

If there is information that would wipe your slate clean, I see no reason not to share it.

'Til then, it's all a bluff to me.

~Zoo

Reply #9 from Stardock Forums Top

I would speak with you more about it, but as you and Tova were both quick to point out, you guys are NOT my friends, and I was a fool to think of you as such.
End of quote

You know Gid; I counted you as one of my friends. Apparently, I must have been wrong. Friends don't lie to each other. On several occasions I felt compelled to offer my hand. I didn't because I reminded myself that you never really know what is on the other side of the screen. I can't say that I am glad that I didn't help you. The best gift of all comes from giving.

What I am glad about is that I didn't stick my neck out for someone who was likely to burn me. You say you owe us nothing and you don't. Don't be surprised though when your past is constantly brought to light though. I have no intention of letting go. You have been presented with some pretty damning allegations. Some of which you have owned up to, most of which you say there is more to the story. If there is an explanation, you should share it simply because many of us who counted you as a friend are left wondering who you really are.

Reply #10 from JoeUser Forums Top
Gid's just this guy, yanno?
Reply #11 from Stardock Forums Top

I find it amazing to see whip and KFC lumped together. Only from a real twisted point of view could this ever happen. This would be like lumping me and hanoijohnkerry together.

Reply #12 from JoeUser Forums Top
Get a life. Better yet, get a family life and stay off JU.
End of quote


YOU DO NOT OWN JU TOVA!

GET IT?
Reply #13 from JoeUser Forums Top
Oh well, that part's easy, Zoo. He won't share it because he doesn't OWE it to us.
End of quote


No, because none of you are friends, as you have made abundantly clear, and I owe you nothing.

Oh, and, LW...my tax return was nowhere near $9000...just for the record. If you can show me how to get $9000 legally, I will give the entire difference to TW's grandfather. In the letter I wrote him, I told him that would be a PAYMENT, and it is just that, a payment. And my May rebate won't be anywhere near $4000, at least not how I read it. Only the $300 per person is guaranteed if you had any earnings...the remainder is a reduction in your net taxes. If it is anywhere near $4000, rest assured, a large chunk will go where it needs to.

You accuse me of neglecting my family, yet you demand I give my entire earnings in perpetuity to TW's grandfather. Conflicting, don't you think?

Every one of you is good at pointing out problems, NONE of you at pointing out solutions. Why don't each of YOU get a life and stop picking MINE apart?

You do not own JU, I have not violated the TOU, and I have barely ventured outside of my own blog. You don't need to read what I write, and frankly, I don't want you to. I write for me, NOT for you.



Reply #14 from JoeUser Forums Top
I counted you as one of my friends.
End of quote


Each of you made it VERY clear that I am not your friend.

If you wanted to speak with me, john, I have NEVER hidden my email. I refuse to make my life part of JU's public forum. I realize each of you are without sin and thus qualified to cast the first stone, but I'll let God judge me, and not the likes of you!
Reply #15 from Stardock Forums Top

I realize each of you are without sin and thus qualified to cast the first stone, but I'll let God judge me, and not the likes of you!
End of quote

Oh, sinned we have...but none of us to such a...magnitude.  Your sin has greatly affected other lives, not just your own soul...I suppose that's what we're getting at here.

If God is real and just, then I hope you have some aloe, because someone is getting a roasting.

~Zoo

Reply #16 from JoeUser Forums Top
Oh, sinned we have...but none of us to such a...magnitude.
End of quote


Oh, so you have pronounced my sin as being greater than your own? Interesting, zoologist. I'd like to know what version of the Bible you read.

And it's good to know that only your select little group can receive forgiveness from God. I guess John 3:16's a typo, huh?

Wow.
Just.
Wow.

I am glad that there are Christians that don't believe as you, KFC, Tova, and SC do.
Reply #17 from JoeUser Forums Top


And . . . "No one cares about your pretexts, Gid".

:)
Reply #18 from JoeUser Forums Top
YOU DO NOT OWN JU TOVA!
End of quote


Never said I did own it Gid. If did have the honor, you would be banned for you own good and that of your family, not to mention the people who blog here.

JU is just feeding your self pontificating addiction.

As to how much you pay TW's grand parents. P-lease. You couldn't clean it up before you left? Couldn't give a little respect to the place they let you stay for free for awhile, before you started paying a paltry little rent?

If you wrote them a $10,000 check today...better make that cash....it still doesn't undo the wrong Gid. Not even close.

Here's the biggest problem I have with you.

You screwed up. Bad. And instead of tending to your life, here you are AGAIN, with the same self righteous attitude.

Maybe in a year or so you'd get a better reception. Then at least we could give you the benefit of the doubt.

But no. Someone mentions taking you off the top users list and your back. Like a bad rash.

If you are blogging for you...then why not blog somewhere else? Why does it have to be here?

Because you are lying AGAIN...its not for you..its ABOUT you and your "readers."



Reply #19 from JoeUser Forums Top
I am glad that there are Christians that don't believe as you, KFC, Tova, and SC do.
End of quote


Give them time to get to know ya.
Reply #20 from JoeUser Forums Top
Ok, maybe your wife isn't 'forbidden' to drive. Maybe towards the end you *did* have internet access at the house. Maybe the story of 5 year olds in crusty, feces-filled diapers was just that, a story. I do believe I mentioned that those things had been told to me in passing and that I had no way to verify those particular rumors.
End of quote


Those are a major part of your argument.

And nowhere have I seen it yet mentioned that there WAS another bathroom in the house!

Look, I KNOW the $500's just a pittance, LW. I ADMIT IT! I will make payments to that family for the rest of my life if I need to, but I simply DO NOT HAVE THE MONEY to make everything right at this point. Have you missed the news stories about the climbing gas prices? It cost us FAR more than we expected to move, and that left us short.

There's one of two things I can do, LW. I can either ignore the problem and wallow in it, or I can MOVE FORWARD, using the past as a lesson and working to make a difference in the future. I choose the latter.

Unfortunately, it seems that you and everyone else on here don't want to see that happen. THAT is the reason why most of you find yourselves on the blacklist.

I'm willing to entertain advice from people who offer solutions, but I have no time for people who can do nothing more than criticize, or even put themselves in the seat of God and declare my sins "unforgivable".
Reply #21 from JoeUser Forums Top
Unfortunately, it seems that you and everyone else on here don't want to see that happen. THAT is the reason why most of you find yourselves on the blacklist.
End of quote


No, we just can't believe anything you say. You lied a long time and were a big fat hypocrite to boot.

Now you're here giving attitude...looks like you been here all day...go spend time with your children!
Reply #22 from JoeUser Forums Top
If you wrote them a $10,000 check today...better make that cash....it still doesn't undo the wrong Gid. Not even close.
End of quote


OK, Tova...get me a time machine so I can go back and fix it.

NEWS FLASH: I CAN'T GO BACK AND FIX IT! ALL I CAN DO IS MAKE A DIFFERENCE FROM NOW ON!!!!!!! Or don't you get that?

If you are blogging for you...then why not blog somewhere else? Why does it have to be here?
End of quote


Because the site I blog on is MY site...and I don't want to migrate a buttload of articles!

Give them time to get to know ya.
End of quote


Actually, I get a pretty good reception from those who DO know me, Tova.

Look, Tova. You hate me (despise was your actual word, I believe). That's all well and good. Just stay away. I won't be bullied away from this site from you or anyone else. And as for banning? I've violated NO TOU, Tova, and there's nothing to merit it.
Reply #23 from JoeUser Forums Top
Now you're here giving attitude...looks like you been here all day...go spend time with your children!
End of quote


Actually, I was here earlier...left...came back...it's what a college schedule will do, you know!

I wasn't giving attitude until I was GIVEN attitude.
Reply #24 from JoeUser Forums Top
I've violated NO TOU, Tova, and there's nothing to merit it.
End of quote


You don't have to violate ToU to get banned, man. All it takes is pissing off the right person.

One can only hope . . .
Reply #25 from JoeUser Forums Top
OK, Tova...get me a time machine so I can go back and fix it.
End of quote


That's not the point. The point is YOU DID IT. You disrespected some old people who helped you.

You let your family live in filth. You got up one day, got in your vehicle and drove away. That isn't an accident. That's not even "messing up."

That's in your character.

You lied, not once, but several times, over and over.

That's also in your character.

Can you change your life around?

YES.

But character flaws take a LONG LONG time. Certainly more than a month.

And coming back here is like spitting in the face of everyone who ever took your side, ever wanted to help you, ever thought you were telling the truth.

It doesn't matter what you have to blog about. Every time your avatar pops up it is a kick in the teeth to the honest people who were willing to give you the benefit of the doubt.

There just doesn't seem to be a lot of shame here Gid. I don't mean lip service either. If I screwed people over as royally as you did, I wouldn't make a point to re-visit a place (JU) where their family and friends are known to socialize.

Why?

Because you wronged them. You should be the one making amends. That means not putting your face around a place they enjoy.

Not telling people you won't be run off. Pfft. It's not about running you off.

It's about you respecting people enough to stay away.

That's how I know you haven't changed an iota.