Make sure that you're logging on to the Diplomacy server.  (In the lower right of your screen, it should say "Diplomacy v1.34".)  (Trinity is just a fancy word for "Diplomacy expansion".)

The best times to find games are between say 2 pm - 10 pm U.S. Eastern Time.  There are normally several 4v4 and 5v5 games every night.  Of course, if you're new you'll want to play comp stomps (people v. AI) or just play single player for a while until you can manhandle Hard level AI and beat Unfair level AI.

Spam LRM, set your planets' rally point to your capital ship, and expand and attack quickly. Eventually build a couple frigate factories on more front-line planets and build from there instead. It shouldn't take too long to get ~50 LRM; once you have that, you'll probably easily plow through whatever fleet your opponent's built.

Remember to upgrade your civilian infrastructure ASAP after you colonize; if you don't, you start losing a large amount of funds to underdevelopment. Asteroids require one infrastructure upgrade to stop losing credits, full-size planets require 2 civilian infrastructure upgrades.

Oh, and I recommend turning pirates off if you haven't already, they're too annoying, especially with AIs with income advantages, and add very little of value to the game.

i am having exactly the same problem as killer , also why i cant creat games on the online lobby ?the players list is empty  and i cant find a lobby for matches except the lan one . seriously for a good game such as this , it is full of frustration when it comes to little details such as this...

You're logging onto Ironclad Online through the Diplomacy expansion, right?  From the main menu, are you pressing the button that reads "Multiplayer" (which is for direct connect LAN games) or "Ironclad Online" (which is what you're looking for)?

thank you killer , that really worked.

but i am really dissapoined that that has happened ( for real "add a player" should be to add some one to ur list not a nick), also there is no quick matching nor a huge community to play with. iam better off offlining it.

thank you all for replying

Sadly, for whatever reasons, 99% of all Sins purchasers never tried Sins in online multiplayer, and many of the people who do log onto ICO only play comp stomp.  (So if 80 people are logged on, perhaps 25 of them play real games.)  The good news is that there are still several larger team games, 4v4 and 5v5, every night without AIs.  However, you'll probably want to make sure that you can manhandle the Hard level AI and consistently beat the Unfair AI before you try it against human players.  Your best bet for finding people is between 2 pm and 10 pm U.S. Eastern time.  It's also more active on the weekends.