I'm Missing You Already

from JoeUser Forums
It's only about ten minutes into second period, and already everything feels so different. I'm just sitting here all alone in the band room. No corny Brandon laugh, and no Dairic trying to kick me off the computer. Our little circle infront of Mrs. Blackstone's room was so small even though only two people were missing from it. And already it's Shaun's turn to take care of Sarah and I. He's doing okay so far. But that's not to say he's going to be perfect at it. His job officially started Sunday when he was taking me home from Alex's party. And no offense to him, but he did a very good job of scaring the living hell out of me. I just thank God for seatbelts. If I hadn't been wearing one, I would have went through the windshield. But I guess Peter wasn't helping either.

The lunch table is going to be empty today. I'll have to sit by Peter. I won't have to listen to the little annoying tap of Alex's hands on the table. Which I'm going to miss. :P I won't have Brandon trying to punch my food, or even try to steal it. And our little pentagon is now down to a triangle. Yet I'm still the only right handed person in it. The life of the party has basically gone. Yeah Shaun is funny, but it's just not the same with out Brandon or Alex. Now I don't have anyone to "try" and shove into the wall with the butt I don't have. I don't have anyone to walk with at the end of the day. And no one to hold me close. I won't have anyone calling me "horse" just because of my flip flops. And I won't have anyone to tell me that I'm a beast.

I guess I'll just try today. And make it all that it's worth. Yeah, things are very different, but I'll just have to live with it. I want to cry so bad, but I can't because that would be letting people down. So I think maybe I'll just keep to myself for the rest of the week. I won't bother people with my sorrow, and I'll try not to let them know that I'm sad. I'm going to try my best to make things work for the next four days I have left here. And that's pretty much all I can do.

~carebear~
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6,087 views 11 replies
Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
*sigh* More responsibilities. I may not be the same as Brandon and/or Alex....but I'm not trying to imitate them, so...what you see is what you get.

And no offense to him, but he did a very good job of scaring the living hell out of me.


No offense taken...I did it on purpose Now when Sarah drives crazy, that's for real.....

~Zoo
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top
*sigh* More responsibilities. I may not be the same as Brandon and/or Alex....but I'm not trying to imitate them, so...what you see is what you get.


Yeah, I guess so.

No offense taken...I did it on purpose Now when Sarah drives crazy, that's for real.....


Hey, leave Sarah alone!!! I like her driving!

~carebear~
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Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
I can't help that I don't drive well!
Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top
I like your driving Sarah!!!! Infact.....I love it !

~carebear~
Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top
your allowed to cry your not letting anyone by doing so, we all know how you feel.
and besides you a friend who is going through almost the exact samething but with a girl he loves. So cheer up a little and take comfort in the tha Brandon and Hoffman will never forget you. No matter how hard they try.
Goodnight America

One more thing try to guess who this is.
Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top
I know I'm allowed to cry.....but I just feel like I'm letting people down. But are you sure everyone knows how I feel? Half the people probably hate me. Or at least that's what it seems like these days. And I'm sure that Brandon and Alex will never forget me.

And I'm not sure who this is. Maybe you could give me a hint or something.

~carebear~
Reply #7 from JoeUser Forums Top
No I'm not sure. Course I'm not sure of a lot of things now a days. And your not going to let anybody down by showing how you feel so long as you don't do it in some dumb way like boozing or cuting yourself and so forth.
and here is your hint
I'm in the group that meets in front of Mrs blackstone's Class room And was at the band banquit.
Reply #8 from JoeUser Forums Top
Okay, I'm pretty sure I know who this is now. Alex Ogan, right? If I'm wrong I don't know who it is then.

~carebear~
Reply #9 from JoeUser Forums Top
Yeah, It's me Alex Ogan. Sorry to disappoint you if you thought I was someone else.

Reply #10 from JoeUser Forums Top
No....I'm not disappointed.

~carebear~
Reply #11 from JoeUser Forums Top
Well then..............
Here is some advice before I leave.
Don't be afraid to show your emotions your not going to let anybody down cause most people will understand. I mean heck, I understand and I'm an idiot.
When standing in a puddle don't touch anything humming.
These people who you say hate you back in your June 4 post do they even know you? If not then ignore them cause you can't let people like that control you. And if they do know you do they know the true you? Well, that's about it if I think of something else I'll come back until then see ya.