19 Years Ago Today
JoeUser Forums
19 Years ago today my heart was wrenched from its chest.
Micah David (Sibit, the name he is buried under, but not the name he bore through his life) had been born August 2, 1981 in Salt Lake City, Utah, the out of wedlock child of my mother and a borderline retarded man in Oklahoma. Micah's father was abusive, but not so much so that we had considered him dangerous. Still, my mother left him in our move to Utah.
Micah had come very close to being another abortion statistic. In one of the hypocritical twists that have turned me off to certain organized religions, he could have been aborted without anyone's knowledge, and yet, by the (I believe proper) decision to keep him, my mother was disfellowshipped and our family ostracized by the religion she followed. Still, my siblings and I were a pretty tight unit, basically the only way we could survive against the dysfunctionality that was an everyday part of our existence.
As Micah grew, he became the only example of unconditional love that I had seen in my life up to that point. He was the only one I knew who could tame my mother's fierce rages, and once even stopped my stepfather from stabbing my older brother. He was sheer joy to be around.
So, even though we were ecstatic to leave our mother, it was with some sadness that we left Micah behind and went to live with our father. And so, we were surprised to receive a call in early December, 1985, that Micah was with his father in the same town where we lived (my stepmother and father had assisted in his fight for custody, as both my mother and father frequently looked for ways to hurt the other). We called back numerous times, but were not allowed to see him.
Then, on December 30, we received the news from a family friend about a news item in the paper. Micah had been killed by his stepfather, sexually molested to the point of rupturing his internal organs. Although his visit was supposed to be supervised by the county, no case worker had visited to document the cigarette burns on his body, which were 3-4 weeks old.
We buried Micah on January 2, 1986, and I was not allowed to grieve. And yet, I have never forgotten.
RIP Micah David Sibit 1981-1985
