Music Review: Boys Don't Cry "I Wanna Be A Cowboy"

Boys Don’t Cry

I Wanna Be A Cowboy

Album: Boys Don’t Cry

Year: 1986

      Nick Richards is Ted, the archetypal Marlboro Man fighting to protect his turf and lady in the snarky “I Wanna Be A Cowboy.”

      Audacious synths open the single, setting a  hotheaded tone.   The area looks clear. He blinks as specks of sand fall into his eyes. He’s grateful for his tan hat to block out the sun. He jumps off his horse, which he named after one of his favorite things in the world, Trigger. He figured it’s manly name that’ll teach him to be tough. His spurs click as he walks. From a distance, he could’ve seen someone. (“Riding on the range/I've got my hat – on/I've got my boots - dusty./I've got my saddle/On my horse/He's called....Trigger/Of course.”)

           In the chorus, he pats his gun. He’s ready to shoot something. He’s got a woman waiting for him back home. She needs to be safe. (“I wanna be a cowboy/And you can be my cowgirl/I wanna be a cowboy/And you can be my cowgirl/I wanna be a cowboy.”)

          A female voice comments on her life. She’s scared, wondering why they stopped. Her hero, her husband, Ted, came up to her one day and tipped his hat to her. She knew then it was love. Together, they live on the prairie. The weather leaves her hair oily. She sweats from being in the sun everyday. Somehow, she never feels clean. But it’s the life she lives. Oh Ted is just so handsome!  (“Riding on the chuck wagon/Following my man/His name is Ted/Can you believe that?/Camping on the prairie/Plays havoc with my hair./Makes me feel quite dirty/Though we all do sometimes.”)

              The chorus is sung again.

             He keeps one hand on his gun and other on his hip. He spits out the tobacco he had in his mouth  and wipes his mouth, dripping with some leftover saliva. In the sky, a cloud of smoke blows straight up. He gets his gun ready. It’s time to defend his county. (“Looking like a hero/Six-gun at my side/Chewing my tobacco/Out on the horizon/I see a puff of smoke/Indians on the warpath.”)

        A man speaking in an Indian voice, says the cowboy talks a lot but his pants are going to turn brown once he arrives. (“White man speak-em with forked tongue/Or not.”)

           An edited verse is sung. (“I wanna be a cowboy/And you can be my cowgirl/I wanna be a cowboy.”)

            At the end, Ted heaves a sigh when no one comes to fight. Eventually, he’s going to come across someone who is going to kill him without a second thought. (“My name is Ted/And one day I'll be dead yo yo.”)

        Richard’s ultra serious vocals wink at the listeners, letting them know it’s a joke and inviting them to play along.  His ramps up the machismo as he mocks the ideal with a dry sense of humor.

      The quirky “I Wanna Be A Cowboy” may seem odd but is a delight for those whose humor leans towards ironic.