Music Review: Carrie Underwood "Before He Cheats"

Carrie Underwood

Before He Cheats

Album: Some Hearts

Year: 2006

              I would like to thank my readers for a wonderful first year back at blogging. The Internet is a huge place. Thanking for taking the time to read my small part of it and sharing my love of music.

           Carrie Underwood won’t let her boyfriend humiliate her anymore in the vengeful “Before He Cheats.”

       A fiery guitar opens the single, setting a livid tone.   She thumbed through the cards and found one with a shirtless man on it. She flipped to the inside. Over the intercom, she heard her name called. Her keys were sharpened. As she paid, she thought of her boyfriend. He said he was out with some friends. But she knows he’s at the bar with some girl’s head resting on his shoulder, leaving fried strands all over his t-shirt. She’s likely putting her hands on his butt. She can see her now: platinum blonde hair with dark roots showing on top (which she covers with a cowboy hat). All the guys in the bar know her considering she’s slept with all of them. He touches the small of the back and ordering a Cosmopolitan for her (“I’m the country Carrie Bradshaw!” she’ll exclaim) and a whiskey for him. She’ll tell him the Cosmos are the most she can handle. Whiskey, she’ll explain, will make her sick immediately. He’ll challenge to a friendly game of pool. “Oh no, I don’t how to play.” He’ll offer to teach her, relishing the opportunity to touch her hand and arm. (“Right now, he's probably slow dancing with a/Bleached blonde tramp and she's probably getting frisky/Right now he's probably buying her some fruity little drink 'cause she can't shoot whiskey/Right now, he's probably up behind her with a pool stick showing her how to shoot a combo/And he don't know.)

              In the chorus, she scrapes the hood with the key, finishing the straight line starting from the driver’s side. With a knife, she cut the tires. She smiles as she hears the air escaping. She unlocks the car and climbs onto the passenger side and spells out her name on the seat. In the corner of the garage, she finds his old baseball bat and smashes the headlights. She steps back for a minute, looking to avoid the fragments of glass everywhere.  She admires her work and walks away. He won’t mess her with ever again. (“That I dug my key into the side of his /Pretty little souped up four wheel drive/Carved my name into his leather seat/I took a Louisville slugger to both headlights/Slashed a hole in all four tires/Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats.”)

              She can picture her up on the stage, singing Shania Twain’s “Man! I Feel Like A Woman” in a baby voice, rubbing her hands all over body. He’s noticed she’s stumbling and as he takes her arm to lead her off the stage, she hiccups and slurs that she’s wasted. He leads her to the bathroom and tells her to right there for him. He’ll be out in a couple minutes. From his pocket, he takes out his cheap cologne and smears some on his neck and arms to cover up the sweat. (“Right now, she's probably up singing some/White-trash version of Shania karaoke/Right now, she's probably saying "I'm drunk"/And he's thinking that he's gonna get lucky/Right now, he's probably dabbing on /Three dollars worth of that bathroom polo/Oh and he don't know.”)

          The chorus is sung again.

         In the bridge, she thinks he’ll think twice from now on. He’ll remember the last time that his ex-girlfriend destroyed his car. (“I might've saved a little trouble for the next girl/Cause the next time that he cheats/Oh, you know it won't be on me/No, oh/Not on me...

          The chorus is sung again.

         A variation of the bridge is sung to end the single. (“Maybe next time he'll think before he cheats/Before he cheats.”)

           Underwood’s curt vocals are proud of what she’s done. He’s not going to report her anyway. It’ll mean he’ll have to admit to what he’s done and that’s not going to happen. She’s relieved to finally show him he’s not the weakling he thought. It’s something he’ll always remember. He’s going to be afraid of her now. 

         The incensed “Before He Cheats” takes matters into its own hands, turning whatever perceived notions of her on its head.