Music Review: Train "Mermaid"

Train

Mermaid

Album: California 37

Year: 2012

                         “Oh, you came into my life with a splash like Daryl Hannah

                         I want to swim in your ocean

                          And rub on sun lotion

                          Aveeno would be proud

                          You have beautiful coconuts

                         They are all I can think of

                         A Disney princess you are

                     You’re my mermaid

                      Let’s go on a date

                      We’ll have shrimp and pate

                       And then we’ll live in LA”

                 Those are my made up lyrics I did before I even heard or read the lyrics. Let’s see exactly how close I am.

                   Pat Monahan falls for a mermaid in the stammering “Mermaid”

                       Summery guitars open the single, setting a humid tone. He took his boat out for the day, wanting to get it away from it all. He would’ve swam but he never learned how. He found an island which would be hard to find except for pirates, like Jack Sparrow. (Yeah! I got my Disney reference!)  He wandered around, doing nothing. There isn’t anything to do but sit and stare at the Pacific Ocean. Then, a beautiful mermaid flaps her tail. He sees her head ducking in and out of the water. He’s mesmerized. He noticed she wasn’t wearing much and he let her have his coat, covering up her breasts. He believes they were meant to be meet. He was depressed and out of options. He finally has something which is his own. They sat on the beach, talking about everything and watched the sunset together. According to Wikipedia,org, he’s somewhere in Washington. He sees his whole future in her. (“Can’t swim so I took a boat/To an island so remote/Only Johnny Depp has ever been to it before/Stayed there 'til the air was clear/I was bored and out of tears/Then I saw you washed up on the shore/I offered you my coat/Thank goddess love can float/Crazy how that shipwreck meant my ship was comin’ in/We talked 'til the sun went down/Love on the Puget Sound/My treasure map was on your skin.”)

           In the chorus, he thinks she’s the most wonderful woman he’s ever known. For the longest time, he thought he wouldn’t find someone to be with. However, with her, marriage and kids is a possibility. In his teens, he would’ve loved having someone like her around. He might’ve done better in school or be known as kinder guy. (“Beauty in the water/Angel on the beach/Ocean’s daughter/I thought love was out of reach/
'Til I got her/Had I known it could come true?/I would have wished in ’92/For a mermaid just like you, whoa/Just like you, whoa.”)

       Other guys give him dirty looks when he is with her. He knows what’s they are thinking: “what’s that dork doing with that beautiful woman?” He thinks of how he attracted her at all. The day they met, he was scruffy, sweaty and burned from the sun. For years, he went through bad breakups, awful first dates, and rejections that ruined any desire to ask out a woman again. Now, he can enjoy life and have the romance he’s always wanted. (“Sharks green with envy, they wonder what you see in me/Funny but sometimes can’t help but wonder that as well/Now life is a holiday, making up for the years I paid/The way to this heavenly bay it went through hell.”)

         The chorus is sung again.

        In the bridge, he says she gave him a purpose and it means a lot to him that she cares what his day is like. She’s incompareable to every girl. He also likes a certain brand of sandals on her. (Yeah! I got my out of nowhere and irrelevant product reference!) For once, guys are jealous of him. (“Rescued you by the banyan tree/All the girlfish in the sea/Couldn't hold a candle to you/They don’t have a handle on you/They don’t have a scandal on you/I love Ecco Sandals on you/Saving me was B-I-G/All the boyfish in the sea/They all wish that they could be me.”)

   Part of the first verse is sung again. (“Can’t swim so I took a boat/To an island so remote/Only Johnny Depp has ever been to it before.”)

      The chorus is sung again.

     He repeats “just like you, whoa” to end the single.

   Monahan’s  eager, rushed vocals drool syrup from his lips onto the floor, sticking everywhere he touches. He’s overjoyed that someone finally likes him he can’t help but boast about it and thank her for giving him the time of the day.

   The cajoling “Mermaid” does whatever it can to make itself look good, trying to cover up the ineptness.

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