The Internet isn’t real life

First off, I want to thank all the people who have written their kind words of support these past few days.

I wish I could say this is the first time we’ve had to deal with a frivolous lawsuit and I wish I could say it was the last. It happens. It’s business. The only difference here is that one party doesn’t normally leak this sort of thing out to get press coverage.

It is amazing how many people will look at a bunch of unsubstantiated allegations and assume they’re true or assume that they are seeing even a tiny fraction of the full story.  I know I’m somewhat guilty of this since I have often taken the view “where there’s smoke, there’s fire”.

The emails I get often ask me how I “deal” with some of the vile and ignorant things that have been tweeted to me or said.  The answer is, you can’t take that sort of thing personally.  They’re reacting to drama they’re reading without really thinking any of it through.

I’ve been online for almost 30 years now – since Commodore 64 BBS days. It is extremely easy for someone to make things up and pass them off as fact.  I once got forwarded a claim by someone who said that we made female units in War of Magic weaker than males (they’re identical other than graphics).  But someone makes something up, it gets past on and it eventually becomes fact.

Heck, every time I go over to BluesNews.com, there’s some guy who insists I’m a Glenn Beck fan, a show I’ve never even watched. That’s why it is important to remember that the Internet isn’t real life.  That is why I’ve told my younger friends to be wary of taking their various virtual communities too seriously. It isn’t a replacement for personal relationships with people in real life.

When you are interacting with hateful people, don’t think of them as the norm. And while you can try to fathom where all that hate comes from, it’s ultimately irrelevant. People like that are always hating something. The phrase “haters are going to hate” is a truism. There are people out there who are miserable and there always will be.

There will always be people who will read unsubstantiated allegations, even ones that have direct contrary evidence, and still believe it because they have an inherent need to hate something or someone.  You can’t take those people personally. They’re facing an issue that you can never cure.

As someone who has had the opportunity to start their own business, literally from their dorm room, and build it up over many years, I’ve gotten to see this sort of thing ebb and flow.  My advice to those who have been tempted to lash back at these people who are filled with hate is to just ignore them. You might as well go out and yell at the rain.  You can’t change them. Only they can address whatever it is inside of them that makes them so ready to hate people they’ve never met (whether that be some Internet geek or a politician or celebrity).

The thing to remember is this: There is something fundamentally wrong with someone who is prepared to hate someone they've never even met. There's no point worrying about them.

108,861 views 68 replies
Reply #1 Top

That's really deep, Brad. :congrat:

Reply #2 Top

I've had to talk to current and former coworkers that they shouldn't bother to wade in on this.  They think we're getting crapped on online. But all that would do is create stress for them and make no difference.  It isn't me, personally, they have a problem with. They have to hate something. They  have an inherent need to hate something. 

Reply #3 Top

I've always heard that everything on the Internet is true.

Reply #4 Top

And you're quite right.  Too many online entities exist purely for the sake of pontificating and/or inciting argument.

Others still think it's a safe [anonymous] vehicle for libel, slander and just plain bullying.

Recently an OZ TV  personality ended up in hospital following a suicide attempt in response to being bullied on facebook....

Even an intelligent, educated adult couldn't get her head around the idea of 'simply walk away....facebook is not real'.

Reply #5 Top

That's correct... they are the 'knee jerkers'. Don't let it affect even a moment, for you'll never get it back. 

Reply #6 Top

Quoting Trojasmic, reply 3
I've always heard that everything on the Internet is true.

Well, if it's in writing, it's true. ;)

I've gotten tweets from people saying some pretty vile things. They're oblivious to their own irony.  

Reply #7 Top

Quoting Jafo, reply 5
And you're quite right.  Too many online entities exist purely for the sake of pontificating and/or inciting argument.

Others still think it's a safe [anonymous] vehicle for libel, slander and just plain bullying.

Recently an OZ TV  personality ended up in hospital following a suicide attempt in response to being bullied on facebook....

Even an intelligent, educated adult couldn't get her head around the idea of 'simply walk away....facebook is not real'.

Yea, I'm thankful that I've had 30 years of being abused online. You take allegations seriously. But you don't have to take the "people" who go nuts about it seriously. 

Can you believe it's been over 4 years since I wrote this:

"I'm going to do what I want to do"

If I had a nickel every time someone predicted our ultimate doom...And strangely, our revenue/profit graphs have had a pretty consistent trend line. Which, I think, is half their problem. When is that damn karmic retribution going to come. Surely, this time he'll get what's coming to him, says Internet guy who got banned from some site because they failed their impulse control and allowed their inner crazy out one too many times. Because it's my fault they suck. And soon...oh yes, soon, karma will come for him. 

Reply #8 Top

Quoting Frogboy, reply 7
Can you believe it's been over 4 years since I wrote this:

"I'm going to do what I want to do"

Time flies when you're having fun...;)

Reply #9 Top

Quoting Frogboy, reply 8

Quoting Jafo, reply 5And you're quite right.  Too many online entities exist purely for the sake of pontificating and/or inciting argument.

Others still think it's a safe [anonymous] vehicle for libel, slander and just plain bullying.

Recently an OZ TV  personality ended up in hospital following a suicide attempt in response to being bullied on facebook....

Even an intelligent, educated adult couldn't get her head around the idea of 'simply walk away....facebook is not real'.

Yea, I'm thankful that I've had 30 years of being abused online.

Can you believe it's been over 4 years since I wrote this:

"I'm going to do what I want to do"

 

 

Not to mention, for a lot of these folks, do they not know that many of them can be pretty easily found?  I mean I looked up the dude that tweeted that "die, die, die" tweet at you.  Ha, he had  a lot of personal info just from his tweets that would be easy (well, fairly easy) to find out who he was.  It took me like five minutes or less from when you posted that yesterday.  I guess it's like road rage, folks think they are absolutely in a bubble when they get behind the wheel.  

Reply #10 Top

Keep flying that flag of delusion, brother.  Never mind that the only claims that seem unsubstantiated are the ones you have been claiming against her.  Never mind that even now you continue to lie and mislead.  (Please, all those legal files are public record - Nobody leaked anything).  The fact of the matter is that even if all your claims against her are true and she's making her side up, what we are still left with is tons of evidence that you're an ego-maniacal jackass who thinks it's your "right" to make your employees uncomfortable.  Hell, most of the documents that are convincing enough that you are guilty of sexual harassment comes from your own motion to dismiss filing, which reads like a textbook case of "she was asking for it".  The fact that you still don't understand that this is what people are angry about should be shocking, but I guess not because if you weren't this oblivious to what you were doing, you wouldn't be in this situation right now.

You should take your own advice and stop yelling at the rain like you've been doing non-stop because all this is doing is digging yourself deeper.

Reply #11 Top

And there you have it....[didn't take long]...;p

Reply #12 Top

Haters will be haters no matter what. Logic is not one of their strong suits.

Reply #13 Top

Quoting Jafo, reply 11
And there you have it....[didn't take long]...

Quoting Hankers, reply 12
Haters will be haters no matter what. Logic is not one of their strong suits.

Indeed. 

Reply #14 Top

Isn't that what drives a troll?

 

Reply #15 Top

How do you leak a public document Brad?


Do you think the fact that your game was so bad your own dev was publicly trashing it less than a month before release had anything to do with Elemental being a failure? What about all your ex employees who say they don't know what you're talking about re: deleted marketing material? Maybe they're mad cause you asked them about their nipples too.

Reply #16 Top

Quoting kevlarcardhouse, reply 11
Keep flying that flag of delusion, brother.  Never mind that the only claims that seem unsubstantiated are the ones you have been claiming against her.  Never mind that even now you continue to lie and mislead.  (Please, all those legal files are public record - Nobody leaked anything).  The fact of the matter is that even if all your claims against her are true and she's making her side up, what we are still left with is tons of evidence that you're an ego-maniacal jackass who thinks it's your "right" to make your employees uncomfortable.  Hell, most of the documents that are convincing enough that you are guilty of sexual harassment comes from your own motion to dismiss filing, which reads like a textbook case of "she was asking for it".  The fact that you still don't understand that this is what people are angry about should be shocking, but I guess not because if you weren't this oblivious to what you were doing, you wouldn't be in this situation right now.

You should take your own advice and stop yelling at the rain like you've been doing non-stop because all this is doing is digging yourself deeper.

You see, when you need someone to demonstrate the point you're making, they appear as if by magic.

I could pick through the various eroneous assertions here but what would be the point? This isn't someone who's genuinely interested in seeking truth.  They're emotionally invested already.  

I don't think I could have said it better than he does, "you still don't understand that this is what people are angry about..."

They're angry. They're emotionally involved in something that they scarcely know any of the context but are ready to pass judgment and admit that they're angry about it.  

That's their problem and they really don't understand that this is their problem. 

Thank you for volunteering to make the point. You can go away now. 

Reply #17 Top

Quoting fapoop, reply 16
How do you leak a public document Brad.

The federal case filing wasn't a publicly available file that could be accessed online. It was leaked by a user with a pseudonymn and then an "anonymous" source contacted various game sites.  Kate (from Kotaku) then followed up on that by contacting the plaintiff to find out more and obtained their filings.  So yes, they were leaked. 

We've got a couple other lawsuits pending (IP related) in federal court (patent troll related). Go ahead, try to see if you can find all the related filings.  Cases are a matter of public record. Getting ahold of exhibits, not so easy. As a practical matter, someone has to provide them.

But who am I kidding, I'm just feeding the troll.

 

Reply #18 Top

I was bored, I read the motion.  It was hilarious.  Sad, but still hilarious.

 

When it says that nearly all of her accusations have been withdrawn or altered by herself and that she was dodging her deposition for months, it's true.  If it weren't, millionaire lawyers would be in the big house shortly after it got delivered.

 

Someone here is definitely flying a flag of delusion.

Reply #19 Top

Quoting psychoak, reply 19
I was bored, I read the motion.  It was hilarious.  Sad, but still hilarious.

 

When it says that nearly all of her accusations have been withdrawn or altered by herself and that she was dodging her deposition for months, it's true.  If it weren't, millionaire lawyers would be in the big house shortly after it got delivered.

 

Someone here is definitely flying a flag of delusion.
 

 

Yup. I doubt most of the people attacking Brad actually read the document.  If they did, they wouldn't be so eager to crucify him. The accusations that she is levelling at him can be levelled at anyone that sends an inappropriate email at work.  I get these all the time because people hit the respond-to-all without thinking about who is actually going to get a copy of their email.   I've personally witnessed some real face-palms in the past few years.  

Reply #20 Top

The last thing that the world's political and religious institutions want are people that can think for themselves. These institutions only want docile, unthinking sheep that will go and do what these sheep dogs decide is best. Small wonder that these intellectually stunted sheep will believe anything that is posted in the internet.

Reply #21 Top

@kku, I think the issue is that there are a lot of unhappy people on the Internet.  And they look for reasons to be "angry" at people. And their threshold for being "angry" is remarkably low.

Reply #22 Top

Quoting Frogboy, reply 23


I can think of how many NSFW emails I get a week and now wonder if they have any idea what would happen if someone were to, using the power of legal discovery, scrounge through every single one and present it without context or without the full email chain could make them look however their antagonist chooses to present.

And those people who have some need to hate something will latch onto it. At least for awhile.

You really see this in politics. You have people who *hate* Obama/Romney.  But why? And really, there is no rational answer. They are just very angry.

 

Indeed.  I had a region supervisor for a federal government job cc a rick-roll email (I'm sure you know of those) only it was a redirect to a DoA song "You Spin Me Right Round" set to a homosexual .gif with a counter and a pop-up that opened a new window every time you tried to close it. I found it hilarious, but I know that this supervisor got suspended without pay for two weeks and had to take sensitivity courses.  Oh yea, good times.  

On another note, I have found that the typical "internet e-thug aka troll aka hater" can be put into one of four categories:  

An anonymous crusader who lives at home because he/she is either a teenager or an un/under-employed adult. Someone who is uneducated and tends to believe what ever the flavor of the moment happens to be. Someone who thinks they have an axe to grind with you over some perceived slight. The last candidate is the most despicable, this is a person who pretends to be something they are not and the anger they show you is due to their own shortcomings, and the only way they get relief is by attacking another person.

 

THe internet has equalized us all by bringing us down to the lowest common denominator.  We are at a crossroads right now.  Google is going to force people to use their real info on youtube.  Twitter and facebook are next.  Internet anonymity will disappear. People will be forced to treat you online the way they would in person.

Reply #24 Top

That the Internet isn't real and that you can't take it too seriously? Or do you mean the guys who popped on without ever having made a post before who vented their spleens to make his point?

Reply #25 Top

I love all the armchair lawyers.  I talked to my dad's cousin's friend's aunt's neighbor who knows a lawyer and he told me that so and so will be in trouble.  Even if you are a lawyer, you aren't involved personally in the matter so you don't know jack.