The First

from JoeUser Forums

Adios 2008. Can’t say I’m sad to see ya go.

I went to see Jay Friday.

He’s in prison here in Ohio; medium security. He is in a comprehensive cognitive behavioral therapy program as well as the AA/NA stuff I blogged about before.

I don’t want to get into all the details. Not because it’s so terrible or great but more out of exhaustion. He is at least learning some productive coping skills, which is a great thing imo. If he gets past his entitlement attitude he’ll really be rockin. It won’t be easy though, not after 37 years of it.

The holidays kept us hopping this year, and now everything is finally taken down and put away, we get to rev back into school.

I hate school. Don’t get me wrong, I love learning. I also realize how fortunate I am to be able to attend without debt or trying to juggle a full time job at the same time. The parts I hate, the parts which make me dread starting back, are twofold. First, the boring subjects. Yes, I know they are important. Yes, I know they will make my education better rounded, helping to clarify the macro picture, yadda, yadda. But really, Statistical Analysis almost did me in with how bone dry and B-O-R-I-N-G it was. And doing the hundreds of hours of research to write a 66 page analysis of statistics….gag..I throw up a little in my mouth thinking of it.

This quarter the only class that looks sleep inducing is Theory. I get the whole idea behind studying theories of a profession. The problem as I see it? No theory is ever really 100%. You have to mix them all together and come up with something workable for you and the situation you’re managing.

Well, duh. That’s exactly what the theorists did before they sat down and wrote the theory. Does it really save me time on the job? Maybe. Maybe not. I didn’t use any of the theory I took for my undergraduate.

Mostly I hate memorizing the names of people who had nothing better to do in their careers than write books on theory. Why are the names considered as relevant as the actual theory? Why not just remember the concepts? If you don’t consider the author’s name = to the theory then which is more important? Well, if you look at collegiate exams you’d think the names are the most important thing. I wonder if that’s because most of these people, who come up with the theory (in this field anyway), and then write books about it, are in fact college professors.

The second thing which makes me dread returning is the time it takes from my family. They don’t miss it, but I do. Hahahaha.

I want to try and finish the JUWC Round Robin story before the weekend is over. Not that I think its really getting read-age…but because I can’t stand to leave a story unfinished. It bugs me. Endlessly.

I know exactly where it’s going, the climax and all, but finding the time is kicking my butt right now. When school starts…..forget about it!

Thank you to all who sent Christmas cards. I didn’t send any out this year. First time ever…but I kept putting it off and then before I knew it…MERRY CHRISTMAS.

Yeah, yeah. I know.

Sad.

Well I hope 2009 is a year in which your blessings multiply, grace is given abundantly, received in equal measure, and your health prospers.

Happy New Year.

Tonya

8,168 views 24 replies
Reply #1 from Stardock Forums Top

:snowman:  

Reply #2 from Stardock Forums Top

And a Happy New Year to you too.  Hope 2009 turns out to be all you want and more.

Galactic Civilizations III
Reply #3 from Stardock Forums Top

A military wife?  You have the hardest job of all....I am not strong enough to marry military, so I did the easier thing I went to basic training.  I wish you all the luck in 2009 ^_^

Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top

If he gets past his entitlement attitude he’ll really be rockin.
End of quote

You know, it took me a long time to finally get through my thick, stupid head that NOBODY owed me a damn thing. Nobody or no thing, and not God or the Universe or Karma what have you. Heh, and once I did get that through my thick, stupid head I found freedom! I hope your brother does the same.

(2008 was a great year for me -but I think it was in a large part because I had decided it was going to be)

Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top

You know, it took me a long time to finally get through my thick, stupid head that NOBODY owed me a damn thing. Nobody or no thing, and not God or the Universe or Karma what have you. Heh, and once I did get that through my thick, stupid head I found freedom! I hope your brother does the same.
End of quote

Glad 2008 was a good one for you.  It wasn't exactly bad all year, but death and prison...two low points.

The whole entitlement attitude ruins lives.  I think Jay is starting to see it now.

For instance he said, "If I work 5 hours a day, all I get is $18 a month."

I said, "That's not true Jay.  You get $45.16 a day beyond that.  That's what it cost to feed you, to give you a bed, and it doesn't count all this therapy program you get, the gym, the track, the heat.  Who do you think is paying for that?  It's not free.  You should appreciate that some people actually stay out of prison and keep a job so you don't starve to death in here."

He said, yeah he never really thought of it that way.  That he was on a sort of welfare, living off the government.

So was it BS?  I dunno.  We'll see when he gets out.

A military wife? You have the hardest job of all....I am not strong enough to marry military, so I did the easier thing I went to basic training. I wish you all the luck in 2009
End of quote

Military wife.  hahah.  Where did you get that impression?  (Curious here..because I don't exactly advertise it, and just glancing at my blog wouldn't give you the impression...so you know someone here?)

Been awhile since I was called that.  But, yes I am.  I also served active duty in the AF where I met and married my husband.  So I am no stranger to the Air Force, officer or enlisted.

See, things in common all ready!  ;)

And a Happy New Year to you too. Hope 2009 turns out to be all you want and more.
End of quote

Thanks Maso.

 

Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top

For instance he said, "If I work 5 hours a day, all I get is $18 a month."
End of quote

He's lucky. In Texas prisons he would work 40 hours a week and get nothing -except maybe good time credits and maybe some slightly better living conditions,

Reply #7 from JoeUser Forums Top

He's lucky. In Texas prisons he would work 40 hours a week and get nothing -except maybe good time credits and maybe some slightly better living conditions,
End of quote

He's really lucky since he is in one of the better prisons in Ohio.  But I don't think he'll fully appreciate that fact until he's out.  His brothers are in much worse.  When THOSE stories get back to him, maybe he'll....well, wait and see I guess.

Reply #8 from JoeUser Forums Top

Happy New Year! I am looking forward to a new year. I always like the thought of a clean slate as well.

I am reading the round robin story but have to go and catch up. I popped on a little bit during the holidays, but not long enough to really read. I was staying calm and collected then, the 23rd came and BAM...then the crazy storm. It is still snowing and shovelling. Criminy.

Good Luck at school and pop in every now and again to keep us straight.

Reply #9 from Stardock Forums Top

just tiptoeing by to say hello. 

Reply #10 from JoeUser Forums Top

just tiptoeing by to say hello.
End of quote

Hey!  Glad to see you.  I read about your new job and I think it is FABULOUS!  Rock on Crazy Mama.

I was staying calm and collected then, the 23rd came and BAM...then the crazy storm. It is still snowing and shovelling. Criminy.
End of quote

I haven't watched much tv, but when I turned it on, I saw the west coast is getting pounded.  Yikes.  And here we sit with less than normal snow fall for 2008, and nothing in 2009 (so far and I'm not complainin).

 

Reply #11 from JoeUser Forums Top

Hey chikka--got a letter from Jay right before Christmas, I'll write him back sometime this week. Tried to call ya too, but you've been on the run so much I couldn't catch ya at home.
End of quote

I'm sorry.  I didn't even get the message.  If my oldest took it, well there is a 50/50 chance I'll actually get it.  He writes the note, but then doesn't bring it out of his room.  So I usually find them weeks later...crunched up and alone behind his desk, or on the floor.  heh.

I'm glad Jay wrote you back.  He didn't say much about the letter except, "I was really mad at you because of your last letter, but then I thought about it awhile, got that letter from S, and decided to not be mad anymore."

So whatever ya wrote helped him with anger.  :thumbsup:

Reply #12 from Stardock Forums Top

hey {{{{{tonya}}}}} sounds like you got the serious low down holiday blues, I always did wonder about having to remember the names of people that wrote books on the subject you were studying. I still wonder whats that about?

Reply #13 from Stardock Forums Top

hey {{{{{tonya}}}}} sounds like you got the serious low down holiday blues, I always did wonder about having to remember the names of people that wrote books on the subject you were studying. I still wonder whats that about?
End of quote

Not really blue MM, exhausted, yeah that's more what I am...but thanks for the hugs.

 

Reply #14 from Stardock Forums Top

Happy New Year, Tova...glad you survived statistical analysis (yuck). 

Here is hoping your school semester is a success...I would love to go back and get my Master's in the near future.  I've been getting small epiphanies about making changes in my career, so I hope it will happen soon!

Reply #15 from JoeUser Forums Top

Now we gotta work on your anger, lol.
End of quote

Don't mistake my loud personality for anger. ;P

I'm over it.  The original stuff anyway...no promises on the future...I get mad but can't really maintain it...takes too much time and energy.

Plus I don't ever want to be one of those angry bitter women who life can never seem to please.

Reply #16 from JoeUser Forums Top

Here is hoping your school semester is a success...I would love to go back and get my Master's in the near future. I've been getting small epiphanies about making changes in my career, so I hope it will happen soon!
End of quote

I hope you get a chance to go back if that's what you want.  My dream job would be to stay home and take care of my family while writing fiction....heh...but that seems more like a hobby (the writing part) since I don't consistently make money with it.

So I am going public service.  If I can get through all the hoo-ha.  :\

Reply #17 from Stardock Forums Top

I hope the help he gets inside will do the trick to keep him outside.  It isn't easy to resist the influences floating around on the inside.

Hope you do good at skool, I nevr was much good at it...And I wish you the best of new years.  Good to see your name in print.

Reply #18 from Stardock Forums Top

Good luck with school this year and Happy New  Year to  you too!

Reply #19 from Stardock Forums Top

I hope the help he gets inside will do the trick to keep him outside.
End of quote

Heh, you and me both.  :\

Good luck with school this year and Happy New Year to you too!
End of quote

Thanks Donna.  (And thank you for the Christmas Card!)

 

Reply #20 from JoeUser Forums Top

I get mad but can't really maintain it...takes too much time and energy.
End of quote

You ain't joking. I never could understand how people could be piss all day or how they could frown all day. There was this woman I used to work with who would look like she hated the world every single day. She would have this big frown for the whole 12 hour shift. My nickname for her was "Penitentiary Face". Finally one day I just asked her, "Why you mad everyday? Don't frowning all day hurt your face?" She told me, "She didn't realize she was doing but I guess it gets easier the more you do it."

Reply #21 from JoeUser Forums Top

You ain't joking. I never could understand how people could be piss all day or how they could frown all day. There was this woman I used to work with who would look like she hated the world every single day. She would have this big frown for the whole 12 hour shift. My nickname for her was "Penitentiary Face". Finally one day I just asked her, "Why you mad everyday? Don't frowning all day hurt your face?" She told me, "She didn't realize she was doing but I guess it gets easier the more you do it."
End of quote

Sometimes when I am concentrating hard, someone will ask me "What's wrong?  Why ya ma?"

I guess my thinking hard face and my mad face are the same thing.  hahahaha.  Maybe that was the case with your associate.

Oh, I can stay mad for longer than a day...heh.  I meant to say it doesn't last forever, and for things that concern my brother it may take 3-4 days to get over it.  Anger is often like a crucible for me.  There ain't no way to do it but through it.  ^_^   

Reply #22 from JoeUser Forums Top

(((((((Tova))))))) I have been away FAR too long. You're going to school? You go, girl! I have no idea how you do it all... oh wait, by the grace of God. ;-)

Good to read a bit about what's going on with you. Happy New Year!

HC (Heather - http://bellissimanh.wordpress.com)

 

Reply #23 from JoeUser Forums Top

I find Statistical analysis great!  And a lot of the other crap boring.  I long ago resigned myself to be a nerd! ;)

Good luck with the boring stuff anyway.

Reply #24 from JoeUser Forums Top

I find Statistical analysis great!
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Ugh.  All those computations and theroms?  ~shivers~ 

Unfortunately I have to use them again for a couple classes and a thesis if I choose....gag. 

(((((((Tova))))))) I have been away FAR too long. You're going to school? You go, girl! I have no idea how you do it all... oh wait, by the grace of God.
End of quote

Good to see you! 

Come back more often.