Fear

from JoeUser Forums

I'm afraid, afraid of what lurks in the darkest depths of my heart, what he thinks as he wakes this morning, what may have disappeared overnight, our connection was so strong, so urgent and what we both thought would last. My head is full of swirling thoughts, my stomach turns at every twist and yet I sit here waiting.

Will he call me, will he walk away like I offered, the longer the day goes on the more I begin to think he has done just that. The music that surrounds me now is extremely loud, the walls shake with the sound, it's my way of not listening to my thoughts, of drowning every emotion out instead of facing what I caused.

*Sigh* my heart aches, my head feels heavy and I have so much to do "Aimer c'est plus fort que tout" if ony I believed that this morning maybe then my day could begin.
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2,292 views 4 replies
Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
Awwwww, {{{{{{{{{Ice}}}}}}}}}}} you did it again huh? If he loves you....he won't walk away...I don't know why you offered a way out BEFORE you met...not that I think he'll take it...course, I have no idea what brought it on...except perhaps your insecurities....he's probably suffering as you are...wondering why you said or did whatever it was you said or did...I'm not leaving my name...you know who I am...and I'm sure you'll receive a call as soon as possible. xxxx
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top
He did call, he does love me, he's not going anywhere, he says he loves me more for having been honest now though says I'm silly and yes I know who you are and yes as usual you're right lol xxxx
Sins of a Solar Empire II
Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
Of course I'm right... lol You should have asked for my advice before putting yourself through that lol I'm kidding, of course....I know that you feel you should keep most of your feelings for this man private...feel as if to discuss them might jinx it in some way...doesn't keep me from being here though if you need an ear...I also know that isn't the only reason you don't discuss it...I think you also feel like it might bother me...and maybe it would just a tad...but your happiness is more important....so just know I AM here if you need me. xxx