Memo to Mother Nature

ramble

from JoeUser Forums

Summer is over.  Someone needs to let Mother Nature know.  She’s not taking my calls.  It’s supposed to be 95 here today.  That’s hot for September.

I am addicted.  Today I admit it to myself and the world.

Everyday I must have a bowl of mixed sweet corn, pinto beans, white rice, chipped up avocado, and salsa.  I’m eating some right now.  It is so yummy with salsa made from fresh tomatoes out of the garden.

I am making some custom cabinets and counter tops for my laundry room.  (Taking it over as a mom only space.  Not that it isn't already...it IS the LAUNDRY room.) Yesterday I used my husband’s skill saw and jig saw to cut some of the wood.  When he came home he totally freaked out.  He FORBID me to use his skill saw and threatened to hide the blades.  He thinks it’s too dangerous.  What’s up with that?  How does he think I cut wood and plywood when he’s gone?

Part of me thinks its sweet he wants to do it for me.  And make no mistake, my husband is very industrious.  All I have to do is ask once and it is done.  But he’s not always around when it needs done and I am not a patient kind of person.

Part of this forbidding thing is his southern upbringing.  We hit it once before.  I was tired of paying to get my oil changed.  My husband is gone a lot and I figured hey I’ll just do it myself.  And while I was at it, why not take a class and learn how to do tune ups?  Maybe some alternator work?  All the men in my family are mechanics, if not professionally, then recreationally.  I have a knack for it too.

When I mentioned it to my darling husband he FORBID me to be a “grease monkey.”  Hahahaha.  He doesn’t want his wife outside with grease under her finger nails working on vehicles which are his responsibility.

I probably should be offended.  But in twenty years of marriage these are the only two things he’s ever really put his foot down about.  It has more to do with his role as provider/protector than anything else I guess.  He was raised to believe certain areas belong to the man, and if a woman usurps it, well her man must not be taking care of the family.

I don’t know if I’ll be obeying the no skill saw rule though.  I want to be respectful of his wishes, but also want to get this project done so I can move on to the next one.  I have some bead board all measured out and ready to cut, but I am hesitating because he was so adamant about me not using the skill saw.  That virtually cripples my home improvement projects.

Our summer was so crazy busy I get tired thinking about it.  We traveled.  We went to amusement parks.  Baseball, picnics, zoo, on and on.  There are photos, many many photos, and someday I will post them.  Maybe.

Once it cools a bit I am going to separate my lily bulbs.  They took off this year and became way too dense.  I also grew the tallest dahlias I’ve EVER seen.  Next year I am getting dwarf dahlias.  The tall ones have to be staked constantly and are basically a big pain in the butt.

Fall is great.  With the cooler weather I can get back in my flower beds.  Mulching, trimming, thinning bulbs.  I wonder why my husband doesn’t mind dirt under my nails?  Probably because his mom always gardens.  Heh.

If someone could get a Memo to mother nature…..Summer is over.  Please plan weather accordingly.  I'd appreciate it.

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3,749 views 21 replies
Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
Sigh, what a lovely story... I wish my wife took it into consideration when I forbid her to do things... actually, she does. She's more likely to do anything I forbid her. I would forbid her from doing dishes, but I think she'd see through it.

As for the skill saw, it sucks that he doesn't want you using it. It's a tool, and if you're properly trained to use it, why forbid you? The car maintenance, too. Whoever wants to use my skill saw or maintain my car is welcome to it, as long as they're properly trained to do so. It's bordering on stupidity to not allow people to use their natural talents/skills/abilities.
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top
I would forbid her from doing dishes, but I think she'd see through it.


hahahha. Yeah I think that one has "obvious" written all over it.

It's bordering on stupidity to not allow people to use their natural talents/skills/abilities.


So my husband is borderline stupid? What if one of my natural abilities is running people over? hahahahaha

My husband's mother doesn't drive a car, has never done any of the things most women take for granted. Even though we (hubby and I) met while in the Air Force, in his mind his mother is the epitome of femininity. Couple that with the "unwritten rules" (ie culture) of his family/and the south...and wa la. There are some things he just doesn't think are "proper."

My family on the other hand is run mostly by the women. They do everything from being firemen..to owning a construction company.


CursorFX - Customize your Windows cursor
Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
Well, I was going to say 'stupid' but I gave him borderline.

Running people over is not an ability.. it's the lack of an ability.

If you're good at martial arts, you should be able to participate in martial arts - that doesn't mean you should go karate chopping everyone you see. You shouldn't cut up every piece of wood in your house with the skill saw, either.

Edit: And here's hoping we can make the distinction between a stupid action and a stupid person.
Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top

So my husband is borderline stupid?

No, using HIS tools is like wearing HIS underwear.  It is just not kosher.  Everything in the house is yours, the tools are HIS.  It is a guy thing (man rule #12).

Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top
Well, if that was the reason for it, that would be fine. But if the reason is it's "too dangerous" for a woman to use, then it's crap. But if it's because they're HIS tools, which it does say they are, then that's fine for him to forbid you. But, if you buy your own skill/jig saw, you should be free to use them.

Maybe if you let him wear your underwear you can use his tools?
Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top
Nice ramble.   

but I always miss summer when it's gone...
Reply #7 from JoeUser Forums Top
But, if you buy your own skill/jig saw, you should be free to use them.


man rule #13: ALL tools in a house are HIS. Tsk, Tsk, Jythier, do I have to recite them all to you?
Reply #8 from JoeUser Forums Top
Yes, but you might want to start a new article.

And, if he doesn't know it exists, how can he know it's in the house? Heh heh heh...
Reply #9 from JoeUser Forums Top
And, if he doesn't know it exists, how can he know it's in the house? Heh heh heh...


Man Rule #24: The woman keeps track of everything.
Reply #10 from JoeUser Forums Top

but I always miss summer when it's gone...

I do too.  I really do love summer and being outside.  But once it gets too hot to function enjoyably outside...I get kinda bummed.

No, using HIS tools is like wearing HIS underwear. It is just not kosher.

hahahaha  I wear his boxers to sleep in all the time.  He doesn't mind.  Didn't think about the whole, my tools thing though.  Hmmmmm

Well, I was going to say 'stupid' but I gave him borderline.

Sooo generous.

Pfft.  

Well I guess I should tell you I am more than a little accident prone.  My husband knows this of course.  Right now my right pinky toe is swollen twice its size and almost completely purple.  I stubbed it on a base board.  Yup.  Walked right into the wall.  My left ankle and front of my left foot are scabbed and bruised right now too.  I was buying lumber at Lowes in sandals.  I dropped a piece on the front of my foot.  Then as I was hauling the items on a metal flat cart, I ran over the back of my heel.  Just so happened I was using one of the damaged carts, so a jagged piece of rusty metal cut into me.

That's pretty much par for the course with me.

I think its because I am pre-occupied most of the time.

 

Reply #11 from JoeUser Forums Top

The woman keeps track of everything.

Exactly.  Usually not by choice though.

And, if he doesn't know it exists, how can he know it's in the house? Heh heh heh...

True.  I am the person everyone comes to and asks... "Have you seen????"  It's usually two feet from them when they ask though.

Reply #12 from JoeUser Forums Top
I just realized I revealed some man rules to you.  You know I am going to have to kill you now, right?
Reply #13 from JoeUser Forums Top
Your snack sounds yummy.

Dahlias are beautiful. What color are yours? I wish I had a green thumb and your energy.

When summer is done I am ready. I love the fall.
Cool read.

Reply #14 from JoeUser Forums Top
I probably should be offended. But in twenty years of marriage these are the only two things he’s ever really put his foot down about. It has more to do with his role as provider/protector than anything else I guess. He was raised to believe certain areas belong to the man, and if a woman usurps it, well her man must not be taking care of the family.


My husband is like that too. He is generally a fairly modern man. Even does most of the cooking these days! But every once in awhile there is something that I do or say that steps on his masculinity. I'm not skilled like you are, but when I don't know how, I just ask someone. I have learned to be careful what I ask for help for though because he worries that I am making him look bad!!

Man Rule #24: The woman keeps track of everything.


Although I know this was half way a joke, I have something serious to say on the matter. I have actually learned that one of the main reasons we have to keep track of everything is because we organize the house. And our method of organization probably doesn't make sense to him. For example I used to keep all of the plastic stuff in one cabinet and the glass in another. But my husband thought all the pitchers should go in the same place, so he kept putting them somewhere else...Since my husband has started cooking more, we had to talk through how we organized the kitchen. Otherwise we would each put things "up" in a different place.
Reply #15 from JoeUser Forums Top
I think I understand where your husband is coming from but I would never use the word 'forbid' with Toni for fear of my life   . In our house, everything is shared equally with the exception of cooking, which Toni does most of because she loves it and is a fantastic cook to boot.

The only thing I'd be a little unsure about is if she decided to change the oil in the car, not because she couldn't learn how to do it but because at the moment, I don't think she even knows where the oil cap is (shhh, don't tell her I said this   )

My most favourite season is summer and I can hardly wait for it to come here.
Reply #16 from JoeUser Forums Top
Dahlias are beautiful. What color are yours?


They are tri colored. The very inside of the flower is purple or pink, then the wider middle band is white...and the third band matches the center. They are pretty but too leggy for my tastes.

I wish I had a green thumb and your energy.


hahahaha. Let me see. You have three boys, a husband, are going to school taking uber hard classes and you wish you had MY energy? Please, girlfriend, send me some of what you got!

I just realized I revealed some man rules to you. You know I am going to have to kill you now, right?


I ain't that easy to kill Mister. ~swaggers and places palms on hip holstered guns~

Reply #17 from JoeUser Forums Top
But every once in awhile there is something that I do or say that steps on his masculinity.


Exactly. I think part of it is this and part of it is he doesn't want me to get hurt because then he'll have to raise the kids! buwhahahahahaha

Since my husband has started cooking more, we had to talk through how we organized the kitchen. Otherwise we would each put things "up" in a different place


That is so sweet. I just grump or tease my husband for putting things in the wrong place. I don't mind really...he's just so good at everything, anytime I find a flaw I MUST exploit it. hahahahahaha
Reply #18 from JoeUser Forums Top
I think I understand where your husband is coming from but I would never use the word 'forbid' with Toni for fear of my life


hahahaha. If someone told me years ago my husband was going to say the word forbid to me...I'd have snapped a "z" in the air, cracked my gum, and told them he wouldn't be my husband for long. What illusion is youth.

If he forbid me all the time, well Houston we'd have a problem. But he loves me and I know this skill saw issue is more about fear than ability. I AM accident prone. What he doesn't realize though is when I am doing something that requires all my concentration, I give it.

Having said all that....I went ahead and sawed the wood I needed yesterday while he was at work.

What? I am a results oriented gal. Can't stop progress.

Of course I am typing this using a pencil in my mouth to poke out each letter. He broke both my hands for touching his tools after he forbid it.

Ok, so that was a slight exaggeration. What really happened.....

When he came home he sighed and said, "Tonya. Please. You are going to give me a heart attack."




Reply #19 from JoeUser Forums Top
See, now we get the real story. He fears for your accident-prone safety.

Also cool that you went ahead and used it.   

"What he doesn't realize though is when I am doing something that requires all my concentration, I give it."

Familiarity with a tool breeds carelessness... be careful not to be careless.
Reply #20 from JoeUser Forums Top

be careful not to be careless

I don't think I will ever be familiar with something that is so loud my ears cry everytime I start 'er up.  Heh.

Reply #21 from JoeUser Forums Top
Of course I am typing this using a pencil in my mouth to poke out each letter. He broke both my hands for touching his tools after he forbid it.


cough... gasp...

I think the fact of the matter is while I would never forbid Toni from doing anything she wanted to do, she too is accident-prone and would probably avoid anything that could potentially remove limbs a slip of a wrist. She would far rather drive me to Emergency than the other way round.