CYBER PEOPLE ARE NOT REAL

wow! you said a mouthful! thank you!

Kind of an all-over-the-place rant, but I think you're right about people NOT being exactly as they seem online.

Sometimes people intentionally mislead others so that they can be who they'd LIKE to be, but most of the time I think we just create a character in our mind based on what a given person writes, and the reality is quite different.

It used to annoy me when I noticed discrepancies or saw someone "behaving" online in a way that seemed like a departure from their normal persona, but I've gotten to where for the most part I just don't care.

There are folks on JU that I like and respect and who I know somewhat outside of JU, and then there are plenty others who I banter with online that I just am not all that curious about in any real or meaningful way.

TW I know it was all over the place. Couldn't be helped. I was beside myself after doing some catch up reading.

mouthful!

Did I drool?

I was beside myself after doing some catch up reading.

Hehe. Now I'm curious which things you were reading.

Not to nitpick, but with all your considerable experience, somewhere along the line you forgot how to use paragraph breaks, and I nearly went blind trying to read your article. Give us old farts a break!

I'll edit it. Confidentially I had to pull my glasses down my nose to see the letters on the keyboard while typing it!

Hehe. Now I'm curious which things you were reading.

Now now TW, if I were to kiss and tell as it were, I'd be invalidating my own rant!

Now now TW, if I were to kiss and tell as it were, I'd be invalidating my own rant!

I figured as much.

I agree and disagree some.

Here is my take.

I think the INTERNET and places like JU are fairly new to our society. Before the net all you really had were real life relationships. So then this technology develops and some of us find we are forming relationships on line.

The problem? There seems to be two diverse schools of thought about on line relationships.

1. They aren't real. It's only cyber space.

2. They are real, but a new version of reality with no set rules yet.

I tend to lean toward the second.

Now I don't think someone I only talk with on line as my "best friend." But I do consider my interaction with them a relationship. Why? Because to me a significant part of a relationship is about getting to know someone, and doing that by talking or writing to each other.

Granted, they could be lying and I could have a relationship with a fictional character. But I don't need the net for that. I dated a few guys many years ago who were not at all what they represented. heh. And that was in 3D.

This version of reality is still virgin territory. I think lots of people are embarrassed they care about people on JU. Like maybe people will think they have no real life connections.

I care about people on JU (or as you may think, their personas). I don't care if the person doesn't look like I think they should, or say what I think they should, I'm flexible.

When you meet someone in real life how do you decide if you want to get to know them?

I usually decide by how they present themselves, and by what they say. The only thing missing in cyber space is physical attributes. I am as unlikely in real life to know if a stranger is lying to me, as I am on the net.

So yes, it is real. There are real people (though some may be liars) behind every screen and keyboard. And while I would never encourage net relationships to replace real life ones, they certainly make a very nice addition.

That's my take....out!

BTW, I have met in RL two people I've met online (one of whom was a JU), and I wasn't disappointed either time. But I feel like I am fairly good at identifying a fraud.

oh, they're real alright, but I enjoy the distance a computer screen gives.  that's mostly due to my own social anxiety problems, I suppose.  i don't know that i'm like the words I write, i like to play around with points of view and things...dunno if that makes me guilty of trying to be who I wish I were or if that's me being uncensored.  mostly it's a cure for boredom when I can't sleep.

oh, they're real alright, but I enjoy the distance a computer screen gives. that's mostly due to my own social anxiety problems, I suppose

hear hear, I am an awkward person to get along with (noooooo hey??????) in the real world. So thought I would give this a bash, so far I been knocked on the head once! But then I deserved it! *see serentity and others nodding their heads*

My physical body language in the real world comes across as bombastic, bossy, aggresssive and generally dislikeable, hence I am difficult to get along with! You will see this occassionally in my writing ( I blame my hormones and mood swings). I do try to keep this side of my personality to a minimum in cyberspace - I use peotry as an outlet.

In the real world I am not seen as a very nice person because of my bossy ways and the tone of my voice ( which has got me slapped a few times!) really is the biggest culprit. Least here I can speak without sounding nasty, I can add a smiley if it appears harsh to imply a softer tone.

For me cyber space is my new home! SAD case are't I! Like I really care! ROFL *trying very hard to get back on my chuckle wagon*, but since being on JU I have fallen off my chuckle wagon so many times! The humor and a good laugh - very good for me!

yes to cyber space - keeping it as close to real as we can,

psssst just have to add - I wish I knew a bit more about computers though! Also (thick as she shounds) what is BTW ? I have seen this in a number of blogs and just coant figure it out!

BTW = by the way?
BTW = ?????????????

BTW = by the way?

You have a winner!!!


Nadeon, good blog. Yeah, paragraphs would be good!!


Cyber space is not reality, however, there are some honest people out there who do deserve the benefit of the doubt. I guess it would be up to the individual to try to 'see' whose who and who they definately will keep at a distance.

As a community, and it is a community, JU is one of the best out there that I do know of. I've visited a few other sites and how they are leaves a lot to be desired.


I agree with most of what you had to say though.

Cyber space is not reality, however, there are some honest people out there who do deserve the benefit of the doubt. I guess it would be up to the individual to try to 'see' whose who and who they definately will keep at a distance.

Serenity, I don't know as that I've ever disagreed with you, yet I do today. I believe cyberspace is reality. I"m real, I really went fishing today, really had a subway sandwich and a DQ later, and am sharing that info with all of you now and will be proud to share the photos when they're developed. Although due to a camera malfunction the date will say 1994!! ...sometimes the date has to be set every single time I use that camera!!

Guys that are predators are real and they really stalk young girls and boys online. Granted someone can and many do lie about the who and what they are, yet they are still really humans.

To me, this is just as valid as having a penpal, like I did in 5th grade, Marie Harper from Lansing, Michigan. And it's eaven easier to arrange to meet, as many bloggers live in the same state.

Perhaps my perception of cyberspace and blogging is skewed...that's just my outlook on it

I'm not real. I'm just a collection of electrons that got together in a conspiracy to take over the world. As soon as we figure out how to get out of this damned wire you're all doomed!

Serenity, I don't know as that I've ever disagreed with you, yet I do today. I believe cyberspace is reality. I"m real, I really went fishing today, really had a subway sandwich and a DQ later, and am sharing that info with all of you now and will be proud to share the photos when they're developed. Although due to a camera malfunction the date will say 1994!! ...sometimes the date has to be set every single time I use that camera

I thought it was meant that some personas were not real - showing a false front as themselves and not ther true personalities?

Yes the people in cyberspace are real, yes cyber space can be a very dangerous place
but not all people using cyber space show their true selves - some pretend to be stronger than they are in the real world, some shyier, etc etc etc the list is endless the end result is a persona is created or moulded.

peace and light Trudy

jennifer1

I thought it was meant that some personas were not real - showing a false front as themselves and not ther true personalities?

Ahhh my bad, jennifer1, I get it now. yes some show phony personnas...yep.

peace and light to you too jennifer1

thought it was meant that some personas were not real - showing a false front as themselves and not ther true personalities? Yes the people in cyberspace are real, yes cyber space can be a very dangerous place but not all people using cyber space show their true selves - some pretend to be stronger than they are in the real world, some shyier, etc etc etc the list is endless the end result is a persona is created or moulded.

Exactly what I meant. Thx for clarifying Jennifer!

I get it now. yes some show phony personnas...yep.

Exactly Trudy. No harm done! [waves @ Trudy!]

Dan, its is people like you that give the net a bad name... with statements like "The point of all is this; Kids heres a tip for you: THIS AIN'T REALITY! It's diversion. Sometimes very cerebral diversion." and your title "CYBER PEOPLE ARE NOT REAL". This attitude gets up my graw... Saying this and things similar indicates to some that there is free licence to do and to say whatever they will and or please that can and does class as cyber-bullying, and in extreme cases as cyber-terrorism.

The Net is made up of real people with real emotions, talking with or communicating with real people with real emotions. Who are you to say they are not real people?

It would seem that perhaps you have been hurt online in the past, and that saying this then is some form of elixir to help the cyber-pain subside, and thereby give you licence to say and do whatever you please on line... well surprise - it does not!

The comment "Precious few are brave, or stupid enough to be 100% candid about whom they really are. Face it, you don't really know them at all beyond their opinion on a particular topic or comment they have made." is accurate, people may not know with whom they are talking - even more reason to treat people with respect rather than as something that is not real.

The phrase "its only cyber - its not real" is an over-generalisation to cover up something that is being done or said that would not happen if the person was opposite you. This type of attitude can be extended to encompass, for example: going to the local library... slapping someone there whom you dont know, never met, and sayhing oh, its not real, it only the library" or similar "going to a pub, and poking someone in the eye with a pool cue, and saying oh, its not real, its only the pub..." Of course you will say now that its not the same - but in fact it is exactly the same, the only difference is the medium within which it is contained! Another example, perhaps more inkeeping... "writing to a pen-pal and I say all kinds of things to them... then saying oh, its not real, its only pen and paper...!"

You need to wake up, and stop ranting, and begin to see that people use the internet not robots or some mechanical device!

Perhaps you are not real... and just some virtual entity, or mechanicla presence... if so, then sign over all your worldly wealth to me... as according to your title, you are not real...

Wake up - your coffee is cold! In closing you write "Don't bring your egocentric garbage in here." (EDITED: - Added comment) Well practice what you preach... and leave your ranting at home... and not on the net, afterall you are not real, only cyber!


Tova7, you address two issues:

1. They aren't real. It's only cyber space.

2. They are real, but a new version of reality with no set rules yet.

Both are fallacies - as there are rules governing it, and yes it is real. Your final statement "So yes, it is real. There are real people (though some may be liars) behind every screen and keyboard. And while I would never encourage net relationships to replace real life ones, they certainly make a very nice addition." says it all.

Jennifer1 states "Yes the people in cyberspace are real, yes cyber space can be a very dangerous place but not all people using cyber space show their true selves - some pretend to be stronger than they are in the real world, some shyier, etc etc etc the list is endless the end result is a persona is created or moulded."

Yes, cyber-space is dangerous... but so is going to the pub, crossing the road, or going swimming. Each and everyday you pass complete stragers in the street... they could be a suicide bomber, a paedophile, a rapist and murderer... just about anyone... but it would not be nromal to think of people in the street this way, but saying that cyber is not real allows a person to do and to say just what they want when they want how they want to whom they want under the guise of its not real... wake up people, it is real, very real, and currently there are laws being introduced to govern the net, and prosecute those who break the law!

although this is an older article, I liked it, you said some real truths here. Good
stuff. Some fo0lks take Joeuser too damn real, I know I did for a long long time, now I use it for what it is meant for diversion. fun.