To Heck With the Food Stamps, I'm Mad about the Manicures!

Messed Up Priorities

from JoeUser Forums
There has been a lot of talk about the rules and regulations regarding food stamps. A lot of us seem to experience the same observation, these women tend to have beautiful nails! *Notice I didn't say they all have* I would love to have beautiful nails. I don't. You know why? I don't have the time because I am taking care of my home and family!

Before children, I would get acrylic nails because I have a hard time growing my own. It is expensive and very time intensive. You have to sit there for at least an hour every week to two weeks. You have to make it a priority. Once I had kids, it simply wasn't a priority anymore.

I am wondering A)How do these women afford it? and B)Why is it they have time to sit on their butts getting their nails done?

I am sure I will get the "They deserve to feel normal too" argument. Manicures are another luxury item. Not a necessity at all! Designer clothes and coiffed hair, more luxuries. Seem to see a lot of those accompanying food stamps too.

Even seeing an example of this once (which I have seen much more than that) is enough to make you feel a bit bitter about paying for these peoples' groceries. People who deserve the assistance can feel defensive about people citing these instances, but it is one of those frustrating flaws in the system. I have so much respect for the woman with the calculator and pile of coupons in tote as she shops. She plans out a list, estimates the cost and sticks to her plan. I can't say I have ever seen a food stamp user ever reference a list or use a coupon. That is just my experience though.

Another thing I can't figure out is the cell phones. How is it they have cell phones too? Example I saw yesterday, leather coat, designer glasses, manicured nails, talking on the cell while yelling at 3 kids to stay out of the candy. All 3 kids had new sneakers, designer clothes and new coats.

I'm all for helping the needy. I am all for seeing kids get the nourishment and clothing they need. I am not for paying for luxuries I don't even have for myself or my family. My family is buying sneakers from Pay-Less and they are wearing Nikes. That just isn't right.

I am not sure how we are going to get there, but I think somehow our society needs to return to the times when people were proud to make the best of what they could with what they had. They would do anything they could to avoid hand outs. Anyone who doesn't believe that government assistance is a handout is fooling themselves. It used to be people were fine working their way up. Now any job other than the top is beneath them. Why work for less than you can make getting assistance? I'll tell you why, you can start a work record and work toward better jobs. Gain experience. Learn new things. Do for yourself and see how rewarding it is. That is how I was raised and it has worked out pretty well so far.
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Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
I just wish we'd stop giving them aid period. Of course, then people would cry out "Somebody think about the children!" One could get anything if only they have children.
What's funny though is that it seems that "poor" people actually have more comfortable lives than those who work. In fact, one might think that people with strong work ethics are suckers.
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top
Me too!
I'm also pissed off about people who have kids, are on welfare because they can't afford to support said kids..and who keep having more kids! Birth control is free, folks! Is there no incentive to be self supporting any more?! Doesn't anyone want to get off welfare?
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Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
These women are very visible. Less visible are the ones who do not have fancy nails, cars, etc. They are also getting public assistance. They go to church, they work as much as they can. Some of them are disabled or mentally ill. It is easy to target the abusers, but the majority of women do not abuse the system. They were abandoned by their husbands or left abusive relationships. They do not have families who can or will help them. Before you point fingers, find out who the women are, who get public assistance. You may be surprised. Most of them are white.
Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top
When did race come into play? Also, are they really just a vocal minority? My mother, who worked directly with those who received welfare, would say otherwise.
Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top
I can't speak for anyone else, but I was taking about nothing THAN white people, Sherye.

I understand that there are genuine cases, people who, due to circumstances beyond their control, are forced to accept a helping hand from the government. I have no issue with helping them, that's what the system was designed to do - help those who needed a boost to get back on their own feet.

I think that what Jill, Super and I were talking about tho are the people who abuse the system. Those who have no freakin' intention of getting off government assitance programs until someone makes them. Those who take handouts just because they qualify for them whether they need them or not. Those who's intention it is to ride the gravy train for as long as they possibly can, and get as much out of it as they can.

Those are the people that make it difficult for others with a real need to get any help at all. I think Wise Fawn mentioned in one of her recent blogs that she used to be afraid of the red tape she'd have to wade through to get any help ..well, that red tape was created in part by the abusers of the system. Am I right, Wise Fawn?
Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top
Sherye, I don't know how race or going to church has anything to do with what I said. As far as pointing fingers goes, I only stated what I saw. I never said they were all like that. To tell the truth, it doesn't matter. I am talking about the ones that abuse the assistance and make people bitter about it. I am certainly not the only one even on this site that has observed the same problems. Like I said, I don't mind helping those that truly need it. Maybe you should have really read what I wrote before pointing your finger at me.
Reply #7 from JoeUser Forums Top
dharmagrl, don't be surprised if WiseFawn doesn't come to my site. She isn't too happy with me lately. I was one of the authors of one of the "voices" quotes of that article where she said she was afraid of red tape.
Reply #8 from JoeUser Forums Top
I wasn't pointing fingers--i was just pointing out that the abusers are obvious. I hate paying for the inflated salaries of corporate executives also, but since they aren't government programs who can I complain to?
Reply #9 from JoeUser Forums Top
Well, I made a comment that pissed her off too..she used it in her blog 'critiqueing or getting personal' or whatever it was called.
Reply #10 from JoeUser Forums Top
How are you paying the salaries of CEOs? Also, the big difference between a CEO and a lazy poor person is that the salary the CEO receives isn't a handout by the government.
Reply #11 from JoeUser Forums Top

The problem I see is that so often people who are supposed to be "poor" demonstrate that they're poor because they don't work and they make poor decisions with what money they have.


This example is a good one because it nails (no pun intended) all those issues at once.

Reply #12 from JoeUser Forums Top

I hate paying for the inflated salaries of corporate executives also, but since they aren't government programs who can I complain to?


As a corporate CEO and the one who provides this site to you freely, I'd like to know how you are paying my salary.

Reply #13 from JoeUser Forums Top
Hey, the way I see it, if you are truly needy there is no reason to get defensive about this. You wouldn't be one of these people. If you are trying to say these people don't exist (as WiseFawn said the are getting their nails at the dollar store....right) then you are delusional.

Sherye, you are right. the people who abuse it in this way are obvious. This doesn't detract from my point. It makes paying my taxes a much more bitter pill when I see this happening. You can claim that most people are deserving of the assistance I am paying for but there is no conclusive evidence of this. I know there are deserving recipients but I don't know that there aren't just as many if not more undeserving.
Reply #15 from JoeUser Forums Top

Studies have shown that low intelligence and poverty go hand in hand. Not as a total trend, of course, but as a general reality it's true.

It's pretty hard to argue that if you work hard (i.e. full time) and have common sense that you won't end up poor.

Reply #16 from JoeUser Forums Top
Brad,
I will argue the intelligence factor, the people I see "using the system" are remarkably intelligent in learning every loophole
available to them.
Sherye,
Around here ( eastern NC ) the CHURCHES are where the "qualifing education "is , so of course they go to church, and once they start getting "paid" they tithe like hell......
Jilluser,
I posted on wisefawns article about finding shoe, coats, fast food wrappers and the like, in a car I repo'd, all quality stuff, that was never reclaimed.............and yes, federal assistance was the non-payers income.
Reply #17 from JoeUser Forums Top

Cleverness isn't intelligence.

Reply #18 from JoeUser Forums Top
I agree with you on this. What really angers me is when I see the kids dressed from Goodwill and mom looking like she just had a makeover. I remember just being so irritated - there was a lady on the news - she had just gotten a free gift for her child from a charity - but was saying how great it was because otherwise her children wouldn't have gotten Christmas - but she had long, acrylic nails with the fancy designs (costs extra $$$), a fancy brand name jogging suit on, her hair done, brand new tennis shoes (no shoes ever come from Goodwill or second hand looking that white) and to top it off a mouth of gold teeth but hey she couldn't afford to get her kid Christmas. I know this wasn't a government program but it just irritated me. But I have to say even with all of the abuse I would hate to see the kids going to bed hungary because of the parents bad choices. It's not their fault but the sad thing is that they grow up thinking that way of life is normal and most likely will continue the trend.
Reply #19 from JoeUser Forums Top

One thing that would probably help is if welfare -- whether that be food stamps, aid to the "disabled", whatever were more clearly stated as CHARITY.


If people had to own up that they are receiving charity, they might feel some shame before abusing it.

Reply #20 from JoeUser Forums Top
I totally agree with you on this. To be "middle class" My husband and I work 4 jobs combined. I am tired of working my butt off to see people taking advantage of "said system". I think birth control should be mandated for people that can't pay for the kids they have. If they need to get ahead, do what the rest of is do go to college... get a job, dont spend money on things you DONT need!
Reply #21 from JoeUser Forums Top
Janders, it really does seem simple to some of us to not have kids you can't take care of, work to earn money and not buy things you don't want as a priority to the things you need. Teaching people to think that way is the key. How do you go about that?
Reply #22 from JoeUser Forums Top
I think unfortunatly a lot comes with the values that were instilled on us from our parents. My parents taught us to work hard for what we wanted, that life is not a hand out and that no one especially society "owes us" anything. That if we want or need somthing it is our responsibility to work for it. Are parents not teaching these things so it continues to cycle. How do you break the cycle?
Reply #23 from JoeUser Forums Top
Why would anyone want fake nails anyways?
Reply #24 from JoeUser Forums Top
Birth control is free, folks!

I'm not sure where you are, but around here there is no free birth control....except for abstinence, of course! :)
Reply #25 from JoeUser Forums Top
These women are very visible. Less visible are the ones who do not have fancy nails, cars, etc. They are also getting public assistance. They go to church, they work as much as they can.

Thank you!! I used the system for four years....my dh was a full time college student, while I was working full time, making a little over minimum wage, and we were raising three children. We received just over three hundred dollars a month in food stamps...and we managed to fix nutritional meals every day--okay, so we went out to McDonald's once a month or so, so shoot me! LOL. Not everyone abuses the system, but the ones who do are out there giving the others a bad name.